And, to quote Homer Simpson, what a boy!
Now, that boy turned out to be a girl. And that comically oversized novelty penis turned out to be Maggie’s umbilical cord. And I’m not sure where I’m going with this analogy. But the point is Marshawn was born anew yesterday. First NFL game EVAIR! Now, I was busy all day losing to Yellow Fever in our fantasy baseball league.
(Self-absorbed side note: I hate my life. The final week of the regular season I lay a total smackdown on Yellow Fever to move from 5th to 4th in the league, ensuring that I STILL face him in the first week of the playoffs. And, since we do next year’s draft on reverse finish in the regular season of this year, I moved backwards 1 spot in the draft. And then Yellow Fever bounced me in the first week. So, basically, since I wasn’t able to catch Ragnarok for the 3rd spot, I did only harm to myself by slaughtering Yellow Fever in the final week of the regular season. Why even try?)
Looking past unimportant asides, let’s try to focus on what truly is important here. Marshawn. And my sad inability to catch the whole game. I did see a few carries of his and he looked like Marshawn of old. With a terrible O-Line. He was able to make 4 yards out of nothing. Usual never say die style with his endlessly moving legs. Last I checked he had 8 rushes for like 28 yards, which is not great.
"You aren’t Patrick Chung, are you?"
But by the end of the game, he had had a very good day. He apparently had a key first down run. And he ended up with a touchdown and 90 yards on 19 carries for an average of 4.7. He had a run of 23 yards for his long. He also had 2 catches for 9 yards with a long of 14. So, there musta been a fairly bad play in there somewhere. Oh well. His team ended up losing on a last second field goal, apparently. Rough for all of us. But especially Avinash. But especially all of us.
I look forward to seeing Marshawn do more damage in the future. And trawling YouTube for clips of him running in the pros. And the Bills making the playoffs, so I can see more games of Marshawn running. Or, more realistically, me driving all the way out to a game in Buffalo.
Also, check out this Profile In Heroism about Tedford over at MGoBlue, a popular Michigan blog. They are like me now. Lusting after Tedford! But have they met him and had him virtually hug them? Maybe, who knows? I doubt it though.
This is exactly how he looks like up close. Too bad they don’t have a photo of the small angels who live on his shoulders and play the harp all day.
GO MARSHAWN! GO BEARS! GO NOT EVER LOSING TEDFORD EVAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Edit: Speaking of Marshawn YouTube clips, check out this backflip.