This is the 4th part in the narrative of the Cal FanFest 2007.  Please read the earlier portions first to be up to date.

Words.Cannot.Describe III

Words.Cannot.Describe II

Words.Cannot.Describe I 

When we left off, we had just joked around with Jahvid Best and then proceeded to enter the line for Tedford.  It moved slowly, so that took up a huge chunk of the day.  It was kind of frustrating, because I’d be waiting there in line and get calls from friends giving me updates on the rest of the FanFest.  "Hey, Twist, I just found SydQuan, he’s over by North Tunnel."  "Twist, I just got a signature of Rulon Davis, he’s near the O-Line table."  But we were stuck in line, just waiting.  But none of those people were as important as Tedford, so who gives a doodle?????  A lot of other players, mostly on D, started to make their way down to the field.   

That white guy with the curly hair there had the last name Mohamed, which must confuse a whole lot of airport security.  Dude on the right had the last name Kapp.  I think he’s related to Joe Kapp.  

Then, the other THA1, Worrell Williams, came down and waked right by.

Constanzo actually stood near me for a long while talking with friends.  He has an interesting look, but, I’ll be honest, I like the cut of his jib.  Follett came running by with his crazy hair.  He had been standing up in the stands talking with a whole lot of attractive females before coming down.

Finally, after the long wait, as player after player wandered by us, the time had come.  The time for Tedford!

Like a teenage girl about to go on her first date, we had agonized over what to say to Coach Tedford as the we got him.  We had like 45 minutes to talk about it, but as soon as I got up I forgot everything I was going to say.  I thanked him for changing the atmosphere around Berkeley.  I said before he got here, it was dark, gloomy, and I had spent years in the fetal position.  All true!  He laughed at that, which was clearly the most emotionally fulfilling moment of my life.  

We asked for a photo and he was more than happy to oblige.  The only problem was that he was about to write "Go Bears" on my hat, but then he stopped to stand up and take the photo.  Ai!  I was all "Coach, you can write more if you so desire," but he was already up.  And this is when it gets good.  Coach Tedford stands up, throws his arms around us and smiles.  I started to smile and then the insane INSANITY of the moment flowed over me, my head started shaking and my mouth just fell into this stunned expression. 

OH

MY

SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We then realized why the line moved so slowly, because Coach Tedford was very nice and chatting up everybody.  He talked with one of my band friends behind me about how they played at his opening press conference half a decade ago.  I still can’t believe how nice Coach Tedford was.  You always see him so focused, he seems kind of unapproachable.  I mean he’s Tedford.  Tedford!  You can’t just walk up and say hi to him.

But you can!  And we did!  And it was pure glory!  And I’d do it again, if I had a chance.  For cereal!

They had the axe right next to Tedford.  I remember back when I was at Cal, we’d go up to the axe people at Stanford and ask real nice if we could see it and/or touch it.  They were nice people and would say "yes."  Now, we don’t have to.  I mean I do ask the RallyComm people, but thats only to assuage their egos and make them feel important.  Even if they said no, oh, I’d touch the axe.  I’m a rebel like that!  But I more than touch the axe.  I risk potentially getting oral herpes from it!

The Axe is a good kisser.  After meeting Longshore and DeSean, I felt so very happy.  After basically hugging Tedford, I felt like a different man altogether.  With a renewed purpose.  A previously empty vessel filled to the brim with the love of Cal football.  Damn, I just mean, DAMN!  

In the next installment, we finally start to meet more of the defensive players and Thomas DeCoud’s dad.  GO BEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!