Popo & Cal Athletes, So Happy Together
I guess our Cal athletes are having a bit of a boring summer. Over the past week, many of our current and former student athletes have decided to make new friends - friends with the Police.
Making the biggest splash in the Police-befriending department are Cal basketball players Jerome Randel and Patrick Christopher. Apparently Braun isn’t working them hard enough this off season or the kids just got tired of robbing people in Grand Theft Auto on the Playstation, and decided to try it out in real life. Here is the police report. Apparently, they were flashing a shiny cell phone at random people on the street and demanding money. But all in good fun. Because who doesn’t like to have their ass tightened up by two dudes in a car flashing a gun looking thing at you while demanding your wallet? Lucky for Randle and Christopher, neither of their unsuspecting victims was packing heat otherwise they might have found themselves in a real shootout with only a shiny wannabe cell phone gun. Anyways, it appears as if neither of the two pranksters are going to serve time, even despite the fact that they apparently have done this multiple times before. So instead of a seriously embarassing situation of two athletes actually attempting to rob people, it’s only a mildly embarassing situation of two youths who forgot that April Fools is in April.
Next to make friends with the Po-po is former Cal footballer Tosh Lupoi. Currently, Mr. Lupoi is a graduate assistant on the football team and helps coach the defensiveline. Unfortunately for Tosh, his 1997 Toyota was broken into via a window smash. That sucks. But that’s not the worst part. Apparently Tosh lost more than $3500 in the incident. $3500!!! Holy crap! What did Tosh have stored in his car? 1000 pounds of whole beef tenderloins? Gold bullion? Marshawn Lynch’s grill?
And finally, former Cal football player Sekou Sanyika, became good friends with ten Berkeley police officers and their batons during a skirmish last friday. The incident took place at approximately 1:15 AM last Friday morning after Sanyika refused to pay for a $4.25 drink at Raleigh’s in Berkeley. Apparently the NFL does not pay that well. The oddest part of this story may not be the fact that this occured over a $4.25 drink but that Sanyika was toting along a "copperhead lightweight bat" and wielded it upon the PD’s arrival. Now, I don’t know about you guys but I usually don’t take a baseball bat with me where ever I go. Not unless I’m expecting trouble. Maybe Sanyika was expecting trouble. Anyways, this story seems too odd to be true. We must not be getting all the facts here. An unpaid $4.25 tab that results in the brandishing of a copperhead lightweight bat, a shower of pepper spray, and a baton beatdown? Too weird to be true.
It must be summer.
