Just got back from San Diego late last night.  Huge victory.  Lots of fun.  If you’ve never been to a bowl game before, the whole experience is a bit different than your normal, run-of-the-mill Cal football game.  More advertisements.  More pomp.  More circumstance.  More everything.  I’ll have more next week, but for now I’ll just mention one little tidbit.

So, after the game, the bowl people present trophies to the winning coach, as well as the offensive and defensive MVPs of the game.  This year’s co-offensive MVPs were, to no one’s surprise, Nate Longshore and Marshawn Lynch.  Handed a microphone, they both thanked the coaches, the fans, their offensive line, etc, etc.  Neither looked particularly interested in a career in being an emcee.  However, Marshawn took the opportunity to hand the mic to someone with a lot more to say, DeSean Jackson.  DeSean, otherwise known as the ‘cockiest man alive’, promptly went out and told the crowd that "next year, National Championship Game!!  And we’re gonna win, baby!!"  The crowd simultaneously roared and went ‘man, is this guy for real?’

So there you have it.  Mark it down, folks.  National Championship Game, 2008 will be a Cal victory, courtesy of DeSean Jackson.  You may now book your flight to New Orleans.

It was nice to see Cal finally win a game in blowout fashion, since I don’t recall them doing that recently at all.  There was that fun shootout with Virginia Tech in the Insight Bowl, that blowout loss in the Holiday Bowl, and then the closer-than-it-really-should-have-been win over BYU in the Las Vegas Bowl, so it was nice to see Cal really trounce an out of conference team.  I don’t think it will completely wipe away the stench of the loss to Tennessee, but we get another crack at them when they visit Memorial Stadium next year, so here’s hoping that goes well.

Of course, that will probably have to be without The Man They Call Marshawn, since every writer and his mother (Todd McShay, Stewart Mandel, and Ivan Maisel, among others) thinks Marshawn’s already made up his mind to leave.  I wish him well, and do honestly believe he’ll do much better than J.J. Arrington at the next level.  I mean, he can’t do much worse.  It was also nice to see our passing game have some semblance of consistency again, as Longshore has really become the barometer of our team and the key to the offense, much moreso than Marshawn.  I mean, even a Football God can’t do much running straight up the middle all the time (ARE YOU LISTENING, TEDFORD?!?!?  When you’ve got a guy with breakaway speed, maybe you can try some tosses or counters or misdirection every now and then.  Just a thought.) if Longshore’s throwing up a stinker like he did against Tennessee and for the second half of the USC game.

Where do I think we’ll end up in the polls next year?  Probably around 16-18 or so.  Our running game should still be stout, since Justin Forsett is, apparently, still alive (though you wouldn’t know it by how he played for most of the regular season) and I always like having speed in the backfield, like with incoming recruit Jahvid Best.  DeSean will be back, as will Robert Jordan, and Longshore should only get better as he learns to read defenses and improves his decision making.  The defense will have to replace Desmond Bishop, but we have an abundance of wealth at the linebacker position, so his departure should just open up more playing time for other returning players there.  Mixon may be back to take Hughes’ spot, so I’m not too worried.

Well, unless Robert Meachem comes back.  Then all bets are off.

Bonus!  As seen here:

When asked if the outcome might help convince his younger brother Devin to finally commit to Cal and continue the family tradition in Strawberry Canyon, Desmond Bishop said, “I think this victory will help him make a decision. We are trying to persuade him. He’s still young, he’s still trying to find his way, but I think this win will show him our talent and how good we are going to be next year. The whole institution of Cal is on the rise, especially in football. His choice should be easy now.”

The final potential benefit was revealed to Bear Insider well after the game ended, by Cal play-by-play man Joe Starkey.

"There’s a large group of alumni who have been involved in raising money for the coaching contracts, and were responsible when he got his big raise a couple of years ago. The word I get is that they are VERY close to another new contract for Tedford, more dollars for him and for his assistants, that will carry him much longer into the future."

Hi, I’m back.  You may remember me as the guy who did a million previews of a million bowl games that no one watched, and who received a J.J. Arrington jersey from his girlfriend for Christmas after asking for a Marshawn Lynch one.  I tried to explain to her her sin by comparing it to, say, her asking for a Gucci bag and my getting her one made out of J.J. Arrington.  I’m not good with these analogy things.  Also, I’m not good at women’s fashion.  J.J. Arrington does have a fashion line, right?

Anyway, I’ve been busy at work (which is where most of the magic - my posts - used to happen), so I haven’t been writing as much.  Also, I ran out of stuff to say for the time being because I don’t care about Cal basketball.  Well, I do, or I would, you know, if we ever averaged over 50 points a game.  Don’t tell me if we are, I still don’t care.  And I’m still kinda annoyed the Nets didn’t take Powe.  (Although Josh Boone isn’t looking too bad either.)

Holiday Bowl tonight.  I say 34-13, Bears.  Following by an announcement that your God and mine is leaving. 

While the rest of the world foolishly thinks Jesus was born on Monday, December 25th, we here at The California Golden Blogs all know he was really born on Thursday, December 28th.  And while some might think He was born in a manger, we know He was really born in a stunningly ugly San Diego-area multipurpose stadium.  Also, we’re reasonably sure that Coach Tedford was His father.

The point is, we’ve been really really good this year.  We went to all the home games, even staying all the way through the 2nd half of the Portland State game.  No man should have to endure that much Ayoob.  Some of us even went to Tennesse and LA and Arizona (Note:  We lost all 3 of those games and are doing what we can to keep this unnamed blogger from getting into the H-Bowl). 

 We cheered on the band.  We never let a single post-TD crowdsurfer fall to the ground.  We always passed those colored pieces of cardboard nicely to the end of the row.  We never chanted "Shoot Em Like A Horse."  We tailgated for 4 hours before every game decked out in as much Cal gear as humanly possible.  We cheered on Marshawn and DeSean and the rest of the motley crue. 

We were the bestest best ever.  So, we humbly beseech you, oh jolly one, please grant us all our gifts this year:

1.  2 healthy ankles for Marshawn

2.  The month of September back for Nate.

3.  Texas A+M punting to DeSean

4.   The ball being thrown within 10 square feet of Hughes

5.   Some sort of complex cannon machine that shoots Desmond Bishop straight at the quarterback.

6.  Dunbar to never be allowed to call a play 1 yard away from the 1st down marker or goal-line. 

7.  A H-Bowl victory to wipe away the stench of 2004.

8.   A Very Brady Christmas

And, of course

9.  Mack Brown’s head on a pike. 

Merry Christmas for all!  Except for TAMU fans!

GO BEARS! 

Coming into this week,  I’d been going back and forth about this year’s edition of the Cal Basketball.  One part of me has been cautiously optimistic, noting that the Bears were playing team basketball, possessing of two particularly valuable qualities that they haven’t had in a while; steady senior leadership at the most important position on the floor, and above-average shooting ability.  The other half of me has noted that the Bears have yet to prove they can beat anyone of substance, which means that a) they could be in for a rough time of it in the Pac-10, and b) they’ll need to pick up some quality Pac-10 W’s to give the NCAA Tournament Committee any reason to invite them, something that could be difficult, given a).

But this week’s events have severely clouded this team’s future.  Tuesday’s game against Furman seemed to go well.  The Bears started slowly, but then figured things out midway through the first half and were on fire through the rest of them game, absolutely blowing out a team it should beat handily at home.  Now, I’m told Furman isn’t that bad of a team, but they just don’t have the athletes to stack up to the Bears, and Tuesday’s result was entirely predictable, even with the loss of Hardin.  And yes, Hardin’s injury is the big story here.  He wasn’t expected to carry this team, but he was going to be one of our stars, and his loss leaves the team terribly thin, both in the post and on the bench.  The Bears have a couple of big freshmen, Ryan Anderson and Taylor Harrison, but that’s it over 6′ 6", and neither of these guys bring to the court the kind of physical tools that DeVon did.  Not that they’re bad players, but they’re freshmen, and they’re different types of players.  Not only that, but it leaves the Bears with only 9 healthy scholarship players (and that number includes Alex Pribble), meaning everyone else is going to have to work that much harder.

Now, I didn’t get to see yesterday’s disaster, and the recaps posted online aren’t very informative, but a couple things stuck out at me.  First, the Bears led by as much as 9 in the first half, and took a 3 point lead into the break.  This is still a talented team, and one that can win ballgames.  They’ve got scorers all over the floor, and can still play Braun’s trademark defense.  However, while the first half was promising, the second half was anything but, as the Bears appeared to fall completely apart, getting outscored 57-26 in the second half.  During the second half, DePaul shot 70 percent (as a team!), while holding Cal to 26 percent.  Sure, the Bears lacked much inside and committed too many turnovers, but the real problem has to be fatigue.  No team shoots 70 percent from the floor if they’re up against any sort of defense.  That’s just embarrassing.  Granted, they’re shorthanded and had a long flight to Chicago, but this team must have just been gassed.  Braun’s got to find a better way to pace his team if they’re going to compete in the Pac-10.

I’m not giving up on this team, but I’ve definitely gone from ‘cautiously optimistic’ to ‘fearing the worst’.  This team needs to show it can play 40 minutes without DeVon Hardin, and their next opportunity isn’t an easy one, next Thursday at Arizona.  Good luck, Bears.

Let’s delve again into the tortured psyche of Texas A+M to see why they are ironically better than Cal.  This time, the key aspect is their state of the art cloning facilities.  Now, it is true that Cal also has some cloning facilities.   We have been able to clone Burl Toler and Tim Mixon and even Joe Shipp (though that clone got away from us, fleeing South).

But that ain’t nothing compared to A+M.  Texas A+M is the first instituion to clone 6 different animal species.  According to this Wikipedia article:

"A&M is the first known in the world to have cloned six different species (Ed:  See!), a Boer goat, several pigs, a Brahman Bull, the first Disease-resistant Angus Bull, the first white tail deer, the first cat and the first horse by an academic institution"

It is clear to all of us at The California Golden Blogs that this focus on cloning livestock shows that Texas A+M is actively researching how to clone Mack Brown.  Why would they try to make extra clones of the leader of their hated rival?  I don’t know, doesn’t make much sense.  But then again, they do go to Texas A+M.  And it doesn’t make any less sense than the first disease-resistant Angus bull.

Plus, how else is Mack Brown going to continually get his family members to undeservingly vote him to the Rose Bowl if he doesn’t have an endless force of Mack Browns, each one more annoyingly cloying than the last.  This is a not-so-phantom menace that could even be worse than Phantom Menace.  Let’s just hope that this apocalyptic hellscape never comes to pass. 

Tune in all this week for further delightfully ironic reasons why Texas A+M is better than Cal.  Moreover, GO BEARS! 

Now, the H-Bowl is in just 1 week.  A lot of other blogs have looked at the matchup between Cal and A+M from a football sense.  Or even maybe a school sense.  But they have all done it from the Cal perspective.  We here at The California Golden Blogs want to give our readers something a bit different, the A+M perspective.  But instead of in any way contacting A+M fans or going to Texas A+M, we are just going to make it all up. 

In a run up to the game all this week, we will be giving a whole bunch of reasons why A+M is better than Cal.  Yes, you read that right, better than Cal.  But don’t worry, we haven’t abandoned our Bay Area roots.  We are just doing it all ironically.  Deliciously so!  

So, in reality, our attempts to praise A+M will, in fact, be a slight tweaking of what I can only assume is a nose as red as their necks.  

But let’s look at our first reason why Texas A+M is better everywhere except for the football field (hopefully).  And that reason is, of course, elder abuse.  While it’s true that Gregory Peck once tried to coldcock Lady Bird Johnson, I don’t think Cal has any alums who are quite as good at beating up old ladies as noted Texas A+Mer Chuck Knoblauch.  Certainly, Keith Olbermann agrees.  And if you brow is as furrowed right now as a Texas A+Mer’s generally is, then read this article about when Chuck hit Mrs. Olbermann square in the noggin with a well-timed barrage of baseballs.

So, there you go, when it comes to alumni who physically injure the elderly, it’s A+M 1, Cal 0.  Tune in all this week to see further reasons why A+M is better than Cal.  Ironically, of course. 

Jay Heater of the Oakland Tribune has written some nice updates regarding the the Student High Performance Center that is scheduled to begin construction this March.  In his blog he revealed that much of the design was done with input from Tedford, the student-athletes and other coaches.  Perhaps JT has been spending his nights in his office with an architect and not just watching video?  Also, it seems clear that despite repeated internet musings from around the country that Tedford is "in the running" for the Alabama job (I know, I know, it makes zero sense for both parties), Sandy Barbour and the rest of the athletic department have kept Tedford right in the middle of things with the stadium upgrades.  This is important in keeping him around, since he will rightly be able to say that he not only turned the Bears into winners, but he moved the program from the 1970’s (or 1930’s) into the new millenium in terms of facilities.

Here are some further details from Jay Heater’s article in the Oakland tribune:

"The $125 million, 142,000-square-foot building, to be constructed along the west wall of Memorial Stadium, will bring Cal up to date with other powerhouse football programs around the country. The center’s roof will serve as a 68,000-square-foot plaza that will be open to ticketed fans on game days and give Cal extra concession opportunities."

Also, Tedford apparently is confident that construction WILL begin in March, despite impending lawsuits from the Panoramic Hill Association of Berkeley (must’ve been formed last month), the California Live Oak Foundation of Oakland (you didn’t know oaks are a hugely influential PAC in Sacramento?) and the city of Berkeley. And there are rumors of Stanfurd alums putting together their trust funds to tie up UC in court for decades and prevent all stadium upgrades.  These rumors are, of course, unconfirmed.

Note: Apparently Brandon Jackson, one of the top RB recruits from Oregon who orally committed to Cal a few months ago, will no longer be a Bear.  He lost his scholarship offer due to an "incident" (we don’t know what that incident was).  It remains to be seen if this is a big deal or not, but with 5 RB’s on scholarship coming into the 2007 season, it probably won’t be much of a factor.

There are lots of people I don’t agree with.  Scientologists.  Yankee Fans.  People who think Carrot Top is funny.  Mack Brown.  Some of these people have more defensible positions than others, but part of the fun of having a blog is being able to take their opinions, ridicule them, and replace them with my own, correct opinions.

Some people, however, say things (in public, no less) that are so laughably ridiculous I sometimes can’t believe it.  It’s like manna from the comedy gods.  You just have to accept it and give thanks.

Coming as a surprise to no one, a group of tree-huggers have decided to file an injunction against the University, attempting to stop the stadium project.  I wonder how many trees will be killed by all the lawyers filing paperwork on this case.

In their own words…

Janet Cobb, executive director of the Oakland-based California Oak Foundation, the lead plaintiff:

- "What are the regents thinking? That football is going to give us clean air?"
Um, not unless they all missed that day in science class, where photosynthesis was discussed, and it was determined that football, in fact, did not perform it.  Besides, they’re planting three new trees for every one cut down.  That should mean…oh, nevermind.

- "You can certainly understand the regents’ dilemma…"
I can understand their dilemma, but clearly you cannot.  You have no idea what the regents are thinking.  You think they’re confused about where clean air comes from, and whether it might or might not come from football.

- "…but people are very adamant that these oaks be saved."
Oh, they are, are they?  Which people?  How many?  Why should we listen to them?  Your lawyer had better have a stronger argument than that.

Berkeley City Councilwoman Dona Spring, another plaintiff:

- "To me, that grove is as beautiful as any man-made structure…That huge canopy, all those colors — it really makes your heart sing. It’s so peaceful and magical, you feel like you’re in Mendocino."
Magical, huh?  What, are we threatening FernGully?  It’s statements like this that make people stop taking you seriously.  Besides, have you been to the oak grove?  I used to walk by it almost every day to class.  If it’s so magical, how come I almost never saw anyone there?  Right on campus, and hardly anyone even bothered to walk through it.  Even the homeless, who obviously don’t have anything better to do, seemed to at least have better places to loiter.  Only when someone threatens to cut it down do you come out and declare what a magical and life-affirming experience it is.

I can’t wait for the judge to laugh this one out of court.

Well, after a brief hiatus, I’m back, and apparently, so is college sports news.  Let’s get to it.

First off, college football is back.  The first bowl game is tonight, the, and I hope I can get the name right, San Diego Country Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl.  Man, I can never spell ‘Poinsettia’ without help.  Anyway, the game features…hell, I don’t care.  It features two college football teams, which considering how long I’ve gone without college football, is enough for me.  Seriously, I remember there were several years in a row where I’d actually watch the New Orleans Bowl (back when it was the lead-off bowl), and I’d root for North Texas because I knew a guy whose girlfriend went to North Texas!  That’s how little of an excuse to watch I’ll settle for at this point.  Seriously, have you got something better to do?  Christmas shopping?

Secondly, finals are over at Cal, which means that Cal sports are once again back in action.  Specifically, tonight features the Cal basketball team in their first game since embarassingly losing their own tournament to San Diego.  To help bury the shame, Cal takes on a sure-fire chump, something called Furman.  Really?  That’s the best you could do?  Cal hasn’t played in 10 days, the Holiday Bowl is more than a week away, and most Cal fans will literally take almost any excuse not to watch the Poinsettia Bowl, but folks, this just isn’t it.  Not only do I not expect the game to be close, or have any idea what Furman is or where they’re from, but lately, I struggle to care about Cal basketball.  I mean, the Harlem Globetrotters have long proved that if you play entertaining basketball, you can draw crowds and be compelling even if the outcome is never in doubt.  Ben Braun’s teams, well, they do just the opposite.  I’m sorry, I think I’m going Christmas shopping tonight.  Also, there might be a good rerun of ‘House’ on tonight.  Never can tell with FOX.

As TwistNHook mentioned already, Stanfurd has a new coach, Jim Harbaugh, the 4th in 6 years.  Sure, Stanford hired a ‘name’, but they hired a name that makes me go ‘What?  He coaches football now?’  Seriously, I’m not sure about this hire.  It could be that Stanfurd caught a rising star, but we just don’t have that much information on Harbaugh as a coach.  His career record at San Deigo (a non-scholarship D I-AA program) is an impressive 29-6, but it’s a big leap from the Pioneer Conference (really?  There’s a Pioneer Conference?) to the Pac-10.  Some coaches make it.  Some aren’t ready, or just aren’t good enough.  And maybe he’s a good coach, but can’t get enough good players into school.  We just don’t know.  I will say this about the hire:  at least they didn’t hire another retread.  We may not know how Harbaugh will do, but that’s a darn sight better than the last two coaches.  We already knew Buddy Teevens couldn’t coach when they introduced him at the press conference, and we certainly had to suspect that Pitt knew something we didn’t about Walt Harris if they were running him out of town on the heels of a BCS berth.

Finally, this has nothing to do with Cal, but I just had to mention that the second-ever outdoor college women’s basketball game was rained out.  In the desert.  Played in a retractable-roof stadium, where they just couldn’t get the roof closed in time.  Seriously, people, there’s a reason we play basketball indoors.  Hell, basketball was invented so atheletes could have something to do during the cold and rainy winter months.  There’s no reason for this stupid gimmick.  There’s also no reason, if you’re going to go through with it, not to look at the weather forecast and see if it might be worth it to close the roof!  OK, I’m done now.  Thanks for listening to the rant.

So, Harbaugh is the man at Leland Jr. High School down south there.  Apparently, Blogsome is not set up to receive YouTube videos or something, bc I am having trouble posting the video straight.  But here is the link to a commercial he made back in the mid 90s when he was losing AFC Championship games on Hail Marys left and right. Hopefully, his coaching skill is on par with his acting skill:

Harbaugh cannot show disdain and shock. 

And just for fun here is TecMo Bowl Era Bo Jackson doing his best Marshawn Lynch impersonation. 

 And perhaps someday I’ll be technologically advanced enough to figure out how to post these videos straight without the link.  Oh well. 

Go Bears! 

That’s it, I’m finishing this right here, right now!

Rose Bowl presented by Citi
Who (is playing)?  USC Trojans (10-2) vs. Michigan Wolverines (11-1).
Where (are they playing)?  Pasadena, California.
When (is it all going down)?  January 1, 5 PM on ABC.
First thoughts:  Well.  Obviously I was hoping Cal would be there instead.  And I find Michigan to be slightly overrated since I don’t remember them beating a single decent team.  As a matter of fact, I thought the whole rematch talk was ridiculous.  Never mind that Michigan played Ohio State well and it was a close game - what would have happened had Michigan gotten its rematch and they had won?  What do you think everyone from Ohio would have said?  Then again, that may have been enough to make college football go to a real playoff system, so maybe it wouldn’t have been all bad.  Either way, I suppose this should be a good game.  Though I think both teams are still pretty overrated.
Why (should you watch)?  Because it’s the Rose Bowl, and it’ll be the first decent bowl you’ll actually want to watch (other than the Texas Bowl and Holiday Bowl, of course).  Also to find out if Michigan is overrated (again), or USC is overrated (which would be somewhat unusual, but seems likely) and assess whether Cal has a legit shot at the Pac-10 Title and Rose Bowl berth next year once Dwyane Jarrett and Steve Smith leave.  2007’s ours!  2007’s ours!  2007’s ours!

Tostitos Fiesta Bowl
Who (is playing)?  Boise State Broncos (12-0) vs. Oklahoma Sooners (11-2).
Where (are they playing)?  Glendale, Arizona.
When (is it all going down)?  January 1, 8 PM on Fox.
First thoughts:  Adrian Peterson!  Ian Johnson!  Two guys not named Marshawn Lynch!
Why (should you watch)?  You might want to see what will probably be Adrian Peterson’s last college game, as you sit there and wonder why he gets so much more hype than Marshawn does.  Hey, he’s good, but you’re kidding yourself if you don’t think Marshawn would have put up similar numbers had J.J. Arrington not been around during Marshawn’s freshman year.  And you’re kidding yourself if you think Boise State isn’t going to get the hell kicked out of them by the Sooners.  Yeah, I’m biased, but it seems to me like there are fifteen other teams in the country who could have gone 12-0 against Boise State’s schedule.  I smell a blowout.

FedEx Orange Bowl
Who (is playing)?  Louisville Cardinals (11-1) vs. Wake Forest Demon Deacons (11-2).
Where (are they playing)?  Miami, Florida.
When (is it all going down)?  January 2, 8 PM on Fox.
First thoughts:  Yeah, Wake Forest is a good story, and they’ve earned it, but does this feel like a BCS game to anyone?  Shouldn’t this be like, you know, the 1-800-FLOWERS.com Bowl?
Why (should you watch)?  Because it is still a BCS game, and it might be nice to see whether Wake can put the cap on their Cinderella season (unlike Rutgers).  With that said, I expect Brian Brohm and the Louisville offense to shred Wake Forest and put up at least 40.  So this game has got that going for it.

Allstate Sugar Bowl
Who (is playing)?  Notre Dame Fighting Irish (10-2) vs. LSU Tigers (10-2).
Where (are they playing)?  New Orleans.
When (is it all going down)?  January 3, at 8 PM on Fox.
First thoughts: God, I hate both the SEC and Notre Dame.  Is there any way both of them can lose?
Why (you should watch)?  Because there’s a chance they could get into a brawl after the game, like LSU and Miami did last year after their bowl game.  In that case, Joe Theismann would be proven wrong (like usual) because he said that Notre Dame would never find itself involved in a Miami-FIU-esque brawl.  As for the game itself, Notre Dame is going to get killed.  I think we all know that.

International Bowl
Who (is playing)?  Western Michigan Broncos (8-4) vs. Cincinnati Bearcats (7-5).
Where (are they playing)?  Toronto.  Oh.  Well, at least that explains the name.
When (is it all going down)?  January 6, 12 PM on ESPN2.
First thoughts:  WTF?
Why (you should watch)?  Because it’s always fun to watch Canadians.  They’re just like us, only different!

GMAC Bowl
Who (is playing)?  Ohio Bobcats (9-4) vs. Southern Miss Golden Eagles (8-5).
Where (are they playing)?  Mobile, Alabama.
When (is it all going down)?  January 7, 8 PM on ESPN.
First thoughts: …who cares?
Why (you should watch)?  That’s it.  I give up.  There is no reason on Earth you should watch this.

Tostitos BCS Championship Game
Who (is playing)?  Ohio State Buckeyes (12-0) vs. Florida Gators (11-1).
Where (are they playing)?  Glendale, Arizona.
When (is it all going down)?  January 8, 8 PM on Fox.
First thoughts:  In spite of my SEC bias, I really hope Florida wins.  Why?  I don’t know.  I just don’t like Ohio State.
Why (you should watch)?  Because it’s the national championship game, to find out if Troy Smith is more Charlie Ward than Donovan McNabb, to see whether it’s possible for a team with no running backs to win a national title, and so I’ll feel like all this time and effort writing up all of this was worth it.  Just maybe.

Whew.  Perhaps I’ll write some more on the Holiday Bowl later this week.  Don’t count on it.